2017 Texan Grand Prix - Predicament Predictions!

[Rob Dylan]

Welcome™ to the 2017™ Formula 1™ United States™ Grand™ Prix™ Predicament™ Predictions™!™

Set in the Republic of Texas, the Formula 1 circus travels to Americaland, and the beautiful city of Austin. At least nearby, as far as I'm aware, to the U.S.-Ring, also known as "home of the overtake".

The predicament predictions championship is coming to a close soon, with only four races left. That means only four races for the final results to be decided, and for the grand prizes to be handed out to the noble winners! That's right: grand prizes for the top three when the fat lady sings! Let's get the ball rolling, shall we? Submit your prediction for this race, preferably before the end of FP3 if you don't want to get a penalty. My predictions for this race are:

1. Sebastian Vettel
2. Lewis Hamilton
3. Valtteri Bottas
4. Kimi Raikkonen
5. Max Verstappen
6. Nico Hulkenberg
7. Carlos Sainz
8. Sergio Perez
9. Brendon Hartley
10. Lance Stroll

Pole Position: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Valtteri Bottas
First retirement: Daniel Ricciardo (first lap I'm assuming, probably with Ocon)
Reject of the Race [ROTR]: Esteban Ocon (his first retirement in Chilton-esque circumstances)
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race [IIDOTR]: Brendon Hartley
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race [DBTMOTR]: Daniel Ricciardo
Minor League Premiership [MLP]: Brendon Hartley
Did Not Start [DNS]: Fernando Alonso

An extra point will be given for the funniest alternative race title, as usual. Double points are usable by anyone who hasn't used them yet. For clarification, the candidates eligible for MLP nominations this weekend are: Esteban Ocon, Stoffel Vandoorne, Brendon Hartley, and Lance Stroll

[Dexter249]

2017 "Rock you Like a Hurricane" Memorial Grand Prix for Hurricane Relief

1. Vettel
2. Hamilton
3. Iceman
4. Bottas
5. The Teenager himself
6. Hulk
7. Perez
8. Rally Driver
9. Hartley
10. The Worst Canadian to Ever Drive in F1

Pole : Hamilton
Fastest Lap : Vettel
First Retirement : VTEC just kicked in, yo. (McHonda)
ROTR : Ocon, Colliding with Ricciardo
IIDOTR : Hartley
DBTMOTR : Daniel
MLP : Hartley
DNS : VTEC

[The Chicane]

2017 Susan G. Komen Grand Prix

1. Lewis Hamilton - Mercedes
2. Sebastian Vettel - Ferrari
3. Max Verstappen - Red Bull TAG Heuer
4. Valtteri Bottas - Mercedes
5. Daniel Ricciardo - Red Bull TAG Heuer
6. Kimi Raikkonen - Ferrari
7. Carlos Sainz Jr. - Renault
8. Esteban Ocon - Force India Mercedes
9. Sergio Perez - Force India Mercedes
10. Nico Hulkenberg - Renault

Pole: Lewis Hamilton - Mercedes
Fastest Lap: Max Verstappen - Red Bull TAG Heuer
First Retirement: Marcus Ericsson - Sauber Ferrari
ROTR: Daniil Kvyat - Toro Rosso, being out raced by Brendon Hartley
IIDOTR: Brendon Hartley - Toro Rosso
DBTMOTR: Daniil Kvyat - Toro Rosso
MLP: Brendon Hartley - Toro Rosso
DNS: Fernando Alonso - McLaren Honda

[UncreativeUsername37]

2017 No One There Cares About F1 But We Have To Go There Because It's a Big Market Grand Prix. No, Not China, the Other One.
1. Hamilton
2. Bottas
3. Vettel
4. Räikkönen
5. Verstappen
6. Ricciardo
7. Ocon
8. Pérez
9. Massa
10. Hülkenberg

PP: Hamilton
FL: Vettel
First retirement: Vandoorne
ROTR: The weather
IIDOTR: Hartley
DBTMOTR: Stroll
MLP: Ocon
DNS: Alonso

[AdrianBelmonte_]

Taylor Swift: the concert [LIVE AT COTA]. 1st anniversary memorial

1. Hamilton
2. Bottas
3. Verstappen
4. Vettel
5. Ricciardo
6. Räikkönen
7. Ocon
8. Pérez
9. Stroll
10. Hülkenberg

PP: Hamilton
FL: Vettel
First retirement: Vandoorne
ROTR: Sainz
IIDOTR: Hartley
DBTMOTR: Stroll
MLP: Ocon
DNS: nada

[yannicksamlad]

The After-BBQ, pre-concert US Grand Prix

1. Lewis Hamilton
2. Valtteri Bottas
3. Seb Vettel
4. Kimi Raikkonen
5. Dan Ricciardo
6. Nico Hulkenberg
7. Max Verstappen
8. Sergio Perez
9. Carlo Sainz
10. Esteban Ocon

Pole Position: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Valtteri Bottas
First retirement: Brendan Hartley
Reject of the Race [ROTR]: Brendan Hartley
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race [IIDOTR]: Hulkenberg
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race [DBTMOTR]: Marcus Ericsson
Minor League Premiership [MLP]: Esteban Ocon
Did Not Start [DNS]:none

[This Could Be You]

2017 Russian GP (well I had to, didn't I?)
1. Hamilton
2. Vettel
3. Ricciardo
4. Bottas
5. Perez
6. Ocon
7. Hulkenberg
8. Sainz
9. Stroll
10. Massa

Pole: Hamilton
F. Lap: Hamilton
First Retirement: Raikkonen/Verstappen (collision)
RoTR: Haas
IIDoTR: Hartley (Finishes 12th or so)
MLP: Ocon
DBTMoTR: Palme... oh wait, he's gone. Kvyat, then.

[Normal32]

2017 "Every Man A King, Share Our Wealth!" Huey Long Prize

1. Hartley
2. Kvyat
3. Raikkonen
4. Bottas
5. Perez
6. Stroll
7. Ocon
8. Vettel
9. Massa
10. Grosjean

Pole: Hamilton
FLAP: Hamilton
First Retirement: Hamilton
ROTR: Hamilton
IIDOTR: STR
MLP: Hartley
DBTMOTR: Magnussen

[dr-baker]

2017 Keeping Austin Normal Grand Prix

1. Lewis Hamilton
2. Bottas
3. Vettel
4. Ricciardo
5. Raikkonen
6. Ocon
7. Perez
8. Sainz
9. Massa
10. Alonso

Pole Position: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Valtteri Bottas
First retirement: Magnussen
Reject of the Race [ROTR]: Toro Rosso
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race [IIDOTR]: Hartley
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race [DBTMOTR]: Palmer. No, wait... Magnussen
Minor League Premiership [MLP]: Esteban Ocon
Did Not Start [DNS]: nobody

[mario]

1. Hamilton
2. Vettel
3. Bottas
4. Verstappen
5. Raikkonen
6. Ricciardo
7. Ocon
8. Perez
9. Hulkenberg
10. Massa

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Vettel
First retirement: Grosjean
Reject of the Race [ROTR]: Grosjean
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race [IIDOTR]: Hartley
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race [DBTMOTR]: Grosjean
Minor League Premiership [MLP]: Ocon
Did Not Start [DNS]: None

[RAK]

2017 Overpriced Graphing Calculators Grand Prix

1) Hamilton
2) Vettel
3) Bottas
4) Raikkonen
5) Ricciardo
6) Ocon
7) Massa
8) Verstappen
9) Perez
10) Magnussen

Pole: Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Vettel
First Retirement: Kvyat
ROTR: Red Bull pit crew - convert a nailed-on fourth for Verstappen into an eighth-place finish
IIDOTR: Magnussen
DBTMOTR: Stroll
MLP: Ocon
DNS: None

[tommykl]

2017 "Can't we just end this season and give it to Hamilton already?" Grand Prix

1. Hamilton
2. Vettel
3. Bottas
4. Ricciardo
5. Ocon
6. Verstappen
7. Pérez
8. Hülkenberg
9. Sainz
10. Stroll

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Ricciardo
First retirement: Räikkönen
Reject of the Race [ROTR]: Magnussen
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race [IIDOTR]: Ocon
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race [DBTMOTR]: Räikkönen
Minor League Premiership [MLP]: Ocon
Did Not Start [DNS]: Wehrlein

[Enforcer]

2017 Inevitable Conclusion Grand Prix

1. Hamilton
2. Verstappen
3. Vettel
4. Ricciardo
5. Bottas
6. Raikkonen
7. Perez
8. Ocon
9. Sainz
10. Alonso

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Verstappen
First retirement: Vandoorne
ROTR: idk... Williams maybe?
IIDOTR: Verstappen
DBTMOTR: Vandoorne
MLP: Stroll
DNS: None

[Aguvazk]

2017 Yankeeland gp

1. Hamilton
2. Vettel
3. Verstappen
4. Ricciardo
5. Raikkonen
6. Bottas
7. Sainz
8. Ocon
9. Alonso
10. Perez

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Verstappen
First retirement: Massa
ROTR: Hass
IIDOTR: Alonso
DBTMOTR: Kvyatt
MLP: Ocon
DNS: Palmer, too bad

[CarloSpace]

1. Hamilton
2. Vettel
3. Bottas
4. Ricciardo
5. Räikkönen
6. Verstappen
7. Perez
8. Hülkenberg
9. Ocon
10. Stroll

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Vettel
First retirement: Alonso
Reject of the Race [ROTR]: Toro Rosso
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race [IIDOTR]: Sainz
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race [DBTMOTR]: Massa
Minor League Premiership [MLP]: Ocon
Did Not Start [DNS]: Vandoorne

[Rob Dylan]

Yee-haw, the American race is over, and we have the results of the predicaments predictions, yee-haw goddamn.

1. Aguvazk 22
2. CarloSpace 21
- This Could Be You 21
- mario 21
5. RAK 20
6. yannicksamlad 18
- dr-baker 18
8. The Chicane 17
- Ugncreativeusergname 17
- tommykl 17
11. AdrianBelmonte_ 16
12. Enforcer 15
13. Dexter249 14
14. Rob Dylan 13
15. Normal32 12

So Aguvazk takes his second win of the season, though it was a close race throughout. Mario managed to score a few more points than his direct rivals to increase that gap around where he is comfortable with. His rivals only have three races to go to try to close that gap to him, and they'd better do it soon if they want to beat him. Yannicksamlad won the funniest alternative race title.

1. Mario 273
2. Tommykl 258
3. Ugncreativeusergname 245
4. dr-baker 239
5. Enforcer 236
6. RAK 228
7. This Could Be You 223
8. CarloSpace 220
9. Aislabie 207
10. Aguvazk 181
11. CoopsII 180
12. Rob Dylan 168
13. AdrianBelmonte_ 149
14. Dj_bereta 130
15. Yannicksamlad 116
16. Ataxia 109
----
17. Normal32 100
18. pi314159 93
19. peteroli34 93
20. Watka 91
21. Dexter249 54
22. Simtek 39
23. pasta_maldonado 39
24. RedEyes504 39
25. takagi_for_the_win 37
26. Miguel98 35
27. TheFlyingCaterham 34
28. Bleu 29
29. mash 28
30. FullMetalJack 27
31. Reject_Dom 21
32. The Chicane 17
33. andrew 16
34. Dartanian 12
35. DemocalypseNow 11
- IceG 11
37. dinizintheoven 10
38. golic_2004 7
39. Gonzalez 6

With only three races to go, the number of folks still in this championship is dwindling. Remember, there are a total of 41 points you can win for each race (or 82 if you win that lottery and use your double points). Make wise predictions in the remaining races if you want to win one of the three grand prizes for finishing in the championship's top three positions!

[Aguvazk]

Yippie Kay yeah! Mo fo!!!!!