Grand Prix Rejects

How's this thread been lying dead for two months?

Anyway, I thought of something (cue groans). We're in a series against the West Indies, and this thread's named after a man who I saw bowling the first time I ever watched Test cricket.

That series was when the Windies toured England in 1991. Viv Richards and Malcolm Marshall were making their exits from the tourists' Test team, while in the one-dayers, 40-year-old Gordon Greenidge was also saying goodbye - he played in the first two matches while his place for the third was taken by some unknown herbert called Brian Lara. I wonder what happened to him...?

Meanwhile, for the home side, Test debuts were handed to Graeme Hick and Mark Ramprakash.

Rarely has there been an example of one match introducing us to two of the most notorious cases of cricket's answer to Fisichellitis. These were two players who slashed runs for fun in county cricket, so much so that they were picked for England... where the runs suddenly dried up. So they were dropped. Back to county cricket they went, bash bash bash, huge scores on the board, and they could no longer be ignored for the Test team, so in they came again, and they failed again. In and out and in and out of the side they went, Hick making his last appearance in 2001, Ramps in 2002... and then both retreated permanently to county cricket, where they went on as they always had - runs here, there and everywhere, even when they were both into their 40s.

What happened? Why? How does anyone explain that (ditto Fisichella, Kovalainen and the like)? And are there other examples who are quite so notable?

dinizintheoven wrote:How's this thread been lying dead for two months?

If you're a fan of England, that silence would probably be out of pure shame (the results right now would appear to suggest that England are on to lose the latest match).

mario wrote:

dinizintheoven wrote:How's this thread been lying dead for two months?

If you're a fan of England, that silence would probably be out of pure shame (the results right now would appear to suggest that England are on to lose the latest match).

To be fair, England winning a match is a pleasant surprise at the moment.

Calling it now, you British won't win a single Ashes test. Anyone up for an avatar bet?

RonDenisDeletraz wrote:Calling it now, you British won't win a single Ashes test. Anyone up for an avatar bet?

Avatar bet on that? No chance! At least Trott won't be playing after today's announcement, that might improve our chances a little.

Seriously Root has gone into Border/Waugh mode. Everyone does jack shite around him and he calmly scores the runs. He is no Devereux though.

Him, Williamson, Mathews & Devereux are the young players you feel calm about when they are at the crease at a bad situation. Rahane might be there soon somewhat.

England will win the Ashes. Anything to get out of fixing the problems within the team.

Aguaman wrote:Seriously Root has gone into Border/Waugh mode. Everyone does jack shite around him and he calmly scores the runs. He is no Devereux though.

Sit back and watch as at the exact point he is made captain - maybe some time in 2016/17 - his form suddenly plummets into an abyss that even Zimbabwe would be embarrassed by. Sit back again and watch as he is shorn of the captaincy in 2018 (in favour of Alex Lees who isn't even in the team yet) and almost immediately thwacks England's first triple-century for 28 years. Sit back and watch as he is then re-appointed captain for the 2019 Ashes and averages 13 in a heavy series defeat. And the cycle just goes on and on...

A good friend of mine in his late 40s who's been watching cricket for even longer than I have recently filed for divorce from English cricket, citing an abusive relationship. Someone here said that watching F1 at the moment is a bit like Stockholm syndrome. The two worlds aren't all that far apart.

New era for English One Day Cricket = Getting out on the 1st ball of the match

gg England.

"Jason Roy to face the first ball. Boult bowls, and he's caught first ball!"

It got better.

Well at least they won easily. So positives.

This English summer has taught me that NZ aren't as great as I thought they were.

Can I just say one thing, many times.

YORKSHIRE!
YORKSHIRE!
YORKSHIRE!
YORKSHIRE!
YORKSHIRE!
YORKSHIRE!
YORKSHIRE!

(etc.)

But does Yorkshire have

STEVEN PETER DEVEREUX SMITH - THE BEST TEST CRICKET BATSMAN IN THE WORLD!!!!!!!1

Having nearly been 43-4 at one point yesterday, England have rallied to 430 all out by lunchtime today in the first Ashes test. Great innings by Root, Ballance and Moeen Ali.

This might not be the Aussie walkover that was widely predicted.

Although Chris Rogers has just scored his first ever six in Test cricket as I write this...

Dissapointing start to the match, it's not over yet though, Australia did bowl much better in the second innings though.

And you may think Stuart Broad is a bellend, but he's just removed Chris Rogers. Nine to go in five and a half sessions...

Aaaaaaaand all the optimism and confidence surrounding the England cricket team has been comprehensively swept away in these last two days.

East Londoner wrote:Aaaaaaaand all the optimism and confidence surrounding the England cricket team has been comprehensively swept away in these last two days.

Yay!!

Also Double Ton up Devereux

I love how England are collapsing on a road. 7/64

Boycott wasn't holding back on what he thought during the tea interval. Good job, because this is 1993 all over again.

Sore bottoms for everyone.

I'm going to watch the golf instead.

dinizintheoven wrote:Boycott wasn't holding back on what he thought during the tea interval. Good job, because this is 1993 all over again.

Sore bottoms for everyone.

I'm going to watch the golf instead.

I say '97. England thrashed Australia at Edgbaston and McGrath destroyed them a Lord's

England lost by 409 runs. Too good.

The third Test at Edgbaston is over, with two full days left. A crushing England victory over the Aussies. Which, given the way this Ashes series has gone, means England should be in for a drubbing at Trent Bridge next week..

But for now, let's celebrate (or commiserate) 2-1, 2-1, 2-1, 2-1, 2-1!

East Londoner wrote:The third Test at Edgbaston is over, with two full days left. A crushing England victory over the Aussies. Which, given the way this Ashes series has gone, means England should be in for a drubbing at Trent Bridge next week..

But for now, let's celebrate (or commiserate) 2-1, 2-1, 2-1, 2-1, 2-1!

The fact that Anderson has been ruled out of the next test (and I suspect that he will not be fit for the next one either) does seem to be tipping things that way, which should at least set up an interesting final game.

However, in one sense the last two games have been a little disappointing given that they have been rather one sided affairs, even if there were occasions when one or two batsmen could otherwise lift the form of their respective sides.

It took 2 tests to figure out the right type of pitch for England. Australia relies on Smith, Warner and Rogers too much especially since Clarke is horribly out of touch. The middle order has been brittle for a while, so it comes as no surprise and no one is knocking on the door except Shaun Marsh. Every good current FC player is a top order player (Khawaja, Bancroft, Head, Silk, and so on).

This series will go down to the wire. Andersons absence is an advantage to Australia, but we will need more consistency, especially with bowling. Johnson has shown flashes of brilliance, hopefully he can maintain that sort of form for a whole test

Australia 19/4 after 25 minutes of cricket. Yeah, England are really missing Jimmy Anderson.

EDIT: 21/5 after 4.1 overs. This is unbelievable.

All out for 60. Broad's bowling figure: 8-15.

This is on par with Brazil vs Germany last year at the World Cup. We'll be talking about this innings for years to come.

I predicted a Broad rampage but god damn 8-15.

I'm gonna supplement my wtf with watching original 90210.

Just unbelievable from England today, that was one of the most amazing innings ever. Australia managed to score a run total lower than their international dialing code which is quite special. Stuart Broad is going down in history now.

RonDenisDeletraz wrote:This series will go down to the wire. Anderson's absence is an advantage to Australia.

I don't think so at the moment

roblomas52 wrote:Just unbelievable from England today, that was one of the most amazing innings ever. Australia managed to score a run total lower than their international dialing code which is quite special. Stuart Broad is going down in history now.

RonDenisDeletraz wrote:This series will go down to the wire. Anderson's absence is an advantage to Australia.

I don't think so at the moment

Likewise, I was somewhat pensive given Anderson's problems before this game, but to witness a team being taken apart like that is incredible - it's the first time ever in the history of test cricket that "extras" was the highest scorer for a team.

At least, in one sense, the Sydney Morning Herald tried to laugh about the situation with this poll:

It seems like every time I make a prediction here it backfires horribly. It hurts me to say this, but Australia have simply been outclassed most of the series

Broad has a knack for a demolishing spell. 2009 at the Oval, 2013 at Durham and now this. That's why I always feared Broad more than Anderson. Anderson will get wickets but Broad is more potent. Australia's batsman have lost direction on grafting an innings. This aggressive attitude is stupid if you can't defend. South Africa are the best of both worlds, you have Amla and de Villiers attacking while they can shut down shop like Faf du Plessis and Dean Elgar.

This Lehmann attitude is not helping.

Anyway Bangladesh series it is time to clean house. Clarke, Voges, Shaun Marsh and Haddin go. Bring in Khawaja, Burns and I would keep Watson. Clarke looks lost on the field as a captain without Haddin and Watson.

Aguaman wrote:Broad has a knack for a demolishing spell. 2009 at the Oval, 2013 at Durham and now this. That's why I always feared Broad more than Anderson. Anderson will get wickets but Broad is more potent. Australia's batsman have lost direction on grafting an innings. This aggressive attitude is stupid if you can't defend. South Africa are the best of both worlds, you have Amla and de Villiers attacking while they can shut down shop like Faf du Plessis and Dean Elgar.

This Lehmann attitude is not helping.

Anyway Bangladesh series it is time to clean house. Clarke, Voges, Shaun Marsh and Haddin go. Bring in Khawaja, Burns and I would keep Watson. Clarke looks lost on the field as a captain without Haddin and Watson.

It looks as if the reorganisation is already underway - Clarke has decided to fall on his sword, announcing that he will be retiring from international cricket after the final test match. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/cricket/33834127

Clarke got told that he basically wasn't needed anymore, so he called it quits to save face. That's what I heard.

I've been away from home for a week, out of the usual clouds and rain and into the scorching sun of... er, the Czech Republic, actually. I've been to Brutal Assault, where two Aussie bands turned up. And, as Be'lakor took the stage at lunchtime on the Thursday, there were a few of us English types all standing together, so we decided to sledge them with a few cricket songs, about being 2-1 up, Jimmy Anderson being a legend, and Mitchell Johnson bowling to the left and right. I thought for a minute they might hear us and shout "strewth, there's Poms in the crowd! Davey Warner's scored a century already, you flaming gollahs!" But it was not to be. And none of us knew that the first Australian innings had finished already, within the first session...

The sledging stopped for Ne Obliviscaris, though. Not only because they're a spectacularly talented band, but by now it was 2 am on the last day of the festival - technically Sunday, despite being part of the Saturday schedule, and the last thing I wanted was for them to hear us and spoil the result, which I had this horrible sinking feeling would be an Australian victory by the same kind of thumping margin as at Lord's, within three days. Oh how wrong I was, in a marvellous way, when I returned and watched Channel 5's highlights...

Not to worry, though, because Ne Obliviscaris trounced the competition. At this stage I was utterly shattered, with barely more than five hours' sleep in a far too warm tent for the last four days, my feet were sore from all the standing around, I had a terrible case of headbangers' headache, and for the first time I was feeling slightly sick (which manifested itself an hour later). But, as the Aussies cheekily started their set with a twelve-minute behemoth, all the problems just washed away...

Now bring on South Africa!

South Africa's batting isn't that great either but they have Dale Steyn and Philander, so yeah.

There is an interesting article on the BBC that has been looking at the form of most of the major nations in test cricket in recent years, and it raises an interesting question about the impact of having a home advantage for teams.

It's been pointed out that, over the past 10 to 15 years, very few teams have actually enjoyed that much success abroad - only once in the past 14 years has the away side won the Ashes tournament, and other test series, such as between Australia and India, have tended to be very one sided affairs with the home team almost always winning. In the past couple of years that trend seems to have become particularly pronounced, with the ratio of home wins to away wins increasing: furthermore, it suggests that not only are home sides more likely to win than before, the winning margins are becoming bigger and the odds of a complete whitewash are vastly higher.

Therefore, although England may be celebrating their success right now, if the past trend continues in the next series, it is highly likely that Australia will win the next series by a comparable margin to England right now. http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/cricket/33841265

There are a few reasons

- Lack of tour matches to get in
- Pitch doctoring
- Lack of batsmen willing to play and bowlers willing to bowl consistently.