Grand Prix Rejects

I had a quite horrendous dream last night.

I dreamt Vettel won the first three races of the new season lights-to-flag, with about a 40 second margin to 2nd place in each race.

East Londoner wrote:I had a quite horrendous dream last night.

I dreamt Vettel won the first three races of the new season lights-to-flag, with about a 40 second margin to 2nd place in each race.

Perhaps this is not a comment for this thread, but would people be annoyed if it was someone other than Vettel who did this? I was just thinking that I don't remember many complaints about Jenson Button's dominant start to the 2009 season (although maybe because he did have to fight for some of those wins).

watka wrote:

East Londoner wrote:I had a quite horrendous dream last night.

I dreamt Vettel won the first three races of the new season lights-to-flag, with about a 40 second margin to 2nd place in each race.

Perhaps this is not a comment for this thread, but would people be annoyed if it was someone other than Vettel who did this? I was just thinking that I don't remember many complaints about Jenson Button's dominant start to the 2009 season (although maybe because he did have to fight for some of those wins).

No, they wouldn't. People don't want one person dominating for years, just like anything. Something similar I've wondered: would people dislike Vettel as much if he lost 2012?

watka wrote:

East Londoner wrote:I had a quite horrendous dream last night.

I dreamt Vettel won the first three races of the new season lights-to-flag, with about a 40 second margin to 2nd place in each race.

Perhaps this is not a comment for this thread, but would people be annoyed if it was someone other than Vettel who did this? I was just thinking that I don't remember many complaints about Jenson Button's dominant start to the 2009 season (although maybe because he did have to fight for some of those wins).

Vettel and Button were in very different positions. Vettel in 2013 was already three-times champion, and people were getting bored with Red Bull domination. Button in 2009 had two hard years in an uncompetetive car behind him, and the team had just lost manufacturer support, and no one expected them to do well. This, I think, is why Button winning in 2009 was popular, and Vettel winning in 2013 wasn't.

watka wrote:Perhaps this is not a comment for this thread, but would people be annoyed if it was someone other than Vettel who did this? I was just thinking that I don't remember many complaints about Jenson Button's dominant start to the 2009 season (although maybe because he did have to fight for some of those wins).

Also because there were fewer members in F1R back then

Frankly, I was quite fed up of Button winning after the first couple of races. I remember being totally fed up after Monaco, wishing at least that if nothing could beat the Brawn, that Rubens would stop being a number two and start taking the fight to Jenson. It's probably the only reason I gave a damn about Mark Webber while he was at Red Bull, trying to give myself fake belief that he was good enough to beat Vettel. Which, in hindsight, he clearly was not. Had he gone down a different career path, he'd have been number two to a different champion driver, but still a number two.

My dream last night was interesting, to say the least. It was 2002, and about 10 schoolchildren including me were chosen to have a week-long tour of the Arrows team, around the time that the team really fell into the toilet. The noticeable change was that Arrows were now racing a sickly yellow livery like the 2001 Peugeots in the BTCC for some reason, having lost their Orange sponsorship. Part of the deal was that we'd all get to go and see a Grand Prix, and the race selected was Hungary (why, I have no idea). Anyway, we all meet up with Tom Walkinshaw at the airport, and he seems like a nice man. However, when we get to check in, Tom finds out that we're not booked on any flight to Budapest. Indeed, we're not booked on any flight at all! The real reason becomes clear - Arrows haven't got enough money to go to Hungary (as in real life), but no-one has told us, and Uncle Tom has been hiding the secret. So, Uncle Tom now has to entertain 10 disappointed children, and he does so by giving us a lesson in woodwork back at the Arrows factory! Anyway, it fades away by that point, like the team in real life.

So yeah, I have rather eccentric dreams sometimes.

I dreamt I robbed a bank and unfortunately got caught right away by a SWAT team out on the street. I thought I wouldn't have a chance in court, and since the robbery took place in Texas, and that I accidentally shot one or two employees, and that I broke a police officer's leg while being arrested, and that I tried to escape four times while in jail during proceedings, and that I told the judge repeatedly to sod off, I thought I was a lifer for sure. Or would have an uncomfortable meeting with Old Sparky.
But as it turned out, Enoch was my defence lawyer and I got away scot-free. The system works.

I had a dream I won Monaco in a Sauber, and got up on the podium and the girl I've had an uber-crush on for some time now was there with me. They played the American anthem, and the champagne began spraying, and then I began [CENSORED]..........

In my dream a few days ago I saw the qualifying results for Australia. Vettel was P1, Alonso was P2 and Bottas was P3. For some reason Barrichello had qualified P6.
Vettel won the race, but he had to fight for victory as the lap charts suggested, with one of the drivers in the race being PIQ (Piquet Jr)...

I had a dream where an Audi R18, Toyota TS030, and a Porsche 919 were allowed to enter an F1 race and they swept the podium. Don't ask me why.

go_Rubens wrote:I had a dream where an Audi R18, Toyota TS030, and a Porsche 919 were allowed to enter an F1 race and they swept the podium. Don't ask me why.

Would be an ideal Le Mans result, that would. (So long as it was not a result of attrition, and that the Audi was third, and Mark Webber et al. won.)

Tonight I dreamed Maldonado (Lotus) set pole for the British GP, and Hülkenberg (Force India) won it from Maldonado and Grosjean. But Hülkenberg's outfit on the podium was completely black and orange, without white like in reality. And a commentator said it had been the coldest race in F1 history.

I dreamed that the canon Alternate F1 series in the Sassetti forum was real

I had a dream a week ago, where Kobayashi was on pole for the 2014 Australian GP, but spun off in the first turn. Raikkonen won. I can remember some other things about it, as well:

-Chilton actually overtook someone.

-Both of the Red Bulls stalled.

-Maldonado and Grosjean collided.

-Magnussen set the fastest lap, 5 seconds faster than anyone else.

-There was a 12th team running black cars. No mention, horewer, was given about the team´s name. Their drivers were Bruno Senna and Roy Nissany.

-There was no Saubers, but instead there were Colonis!

-Jos The Boss was Kobayashi´s race engineer. At one point of the race, he fell off the pit wall for some reason.

-Some spectator waved a "HWNSNBM" banner.

-The commentator was none other than Murray Walker!

I had another dream about F1 last night.

It was the 2014 Australian Grand Prix and Button was dominating the field, but OH NO a mechanical failure robs him of victory right near the end!
Cruel Fate indeed!
But this meant that the Williams cars where 2nd and 3rd and the commentators went wild about a Williams Double Podium!
Nobody, including myself seemed to care about the car that actually won the race, other than commentating "oh, is that a Sauber?"

FA1L wrote:-There was a 12th team running black cars. No mention, horewer, was given about the team´s name. Their drivers were Bruno Senna and Roy Nissany.

Could be Andrea Modas?

dr-baker wrote:

FA1L wrote:-There was a 12th team running black cars. No mention, horewer, was given about the team´s name. Their drivers were Bruno Senna and Roy Nissany.

Could be Andrea Modas?

Or Stefans!

FA1L wrote:

dr-baker wrote:

FA1L wrote:-There was a 12th team running black cars. No mention, horewer, was given about the team´s name. Their drivers were Bruno Senna and Roy Nissany.

Could be Andrea Modas?

Or Stefans!

Probably were not early to mid 1990s Saubers though?

It's very unusual for me to have a coherent dream at all, let alone one about motorsport, but last night I dreamt that the family was on a European trip and we were visiting one of my Italian friends. During our stay, a San Marino GP was being run at Imola with 2014-spec cars - while we didn't have tickets, my friend said he knew a place we could watch the race from a nearby hill, so together with my eldest daughter we drove there (about an hour's drive, although in real life he lives about 4 1/2 hours away) .

We arrived at a crowded hill overlooking the Rivazza end of the circuit a few laps into the race, and a large TV screen was playing an English-language broadcast (didn't recognise the network or presenters) that focused for the entire race on an exciting tussle between both Mercedes, both McLarens, Alonso and one of the Williams - there was plenty going on, but nobody knew what was happening outside of these six cars. The only time during the race another driver came to our attention was when Max Chilton spun off at Acque Minerali, which led to a spirited discussion of his talent and future potential amongst the crowd. The finishing order was Hamilton, Button, Rosberg, Alonso, the Williams (can't remember who) and Magnussen, but it wasn't until after the end of the race when none of these six drivers went to the podium and an announcer mentioned in passing "who would have thought that Bianchi would have come third?" that we realised we had spent the entire race focused on the battle for fifth or sixth spot.

It turned out that either JEV or Grosjean had won, Bianchi was 3rd and Vettel 4th (no idea who was 2nd). Apparently JJ Lehto was driving and ended up somewhere in the points as well? My friend and I spent the entire drive back to his house discussing whether the abysmal coverage was due to an English-speaking focus on British drivers or an Italian-owned networks focus on the leading Ferrari.

In 'The Song Remains The Same', Robert Plant sings 'I had a dream, crazy dream...'

And I had a crazy dream tonight.
I woke up in this underdeveloped country, most likely Burkina Faso but I'm not sure, and I felt strange.
It was like I had a fever or was intoxicated with alcohol, or both. I staggered around a bit
in a sort of desert-like place, freight containers were scattered about and there were little huts
here and there where people lived.

They looked exactly like this:


There were some children playing soccer in the distance, and suddenly I stepped in this gooey red
liquid that was lying in a big puddle on the ground. It resembled quicksand because I sank down to my
knees in an instant, and immediately it felt 'wrong' inside my body.

I got out of there, but the red-ish tacky stuff was now consuming me from my feet up.
I was completely covered in it in a matter of seconds and it felt warm against my clothes.
But it was an evil liquid and it's intentions were bad. I felt I was going to faint, the hearing
and vision started to fade, actually I felt I was going to die.
With my last bit of strength I took my pants and shirt off and crawled into an empty hut, it
wasn't uninhabited though because I saw a shower in the corner. I was going to try and wash the
slimy red mucus off myself. But I never made it. I collapsed a couple of feet before reaching the shower
and everything went dark and silent.

I was awoken, inside the dream still, by a young boy throwing buckets of water on my head and body,
until I was clean of the hellish red stuff. I felt life coming back to me, the young boy said
'Ingabe ulungile manje, mnumzane?', but I didn't understand him.

The next thing I remember from the dream is that it was night time, and that there was a party in one of
the huts. I was in the kitchen looking at all the plates of food, but I weren't craving any of it. It looked
quite disgusting.
Then Kimi Raikkonen entered the kitchen from another room, and said to me that he was fed up by being
there and wanted to leave. 'So do I', I replied while I felt a true sense of homesickness.
'How are we going to get out of here', I asked him. He said he had a rental car outside somewhere.

I started packing, apparently I had a bag and stuff to put in it , and was going to leave the place with
Kimi Raikkonen when my aunts husband, whom I don't care for very much in real life, came into the room
and asked 'are you leaving?'.
'Yes of course', I said. I don't want to be here. He got offended by that and suggested we'd use his plane
tickets in seven days time instead.
'I don't want to be here for a whole week', I replied.

Next thing I remember is being in the rental car with Kimi. We hadn't got going yet, I was in the drivers seat
but didn't know where to go. 'How are we getting out of here?' I asked, 'we are in the middle of nowhere'.
'Don't worry', Kimi said, 'I've been here before'.

I think the dream was over at this point, I can't remember any more...

Last night, I had a dream in which Nick Heidfeld was my German teacher

W12 wrote:Last night, I had a dream in which Nick Heidfeld was my German teacher

The lessons may have been slightly boring as a result.

I dreamed about some sort of news announcement that several new teams were joining F1. Haas and Forza Rossa might have been among them, I don't remember, but I do remember that JAGUAR were returning to F1, with a very dark green car that looked more like a greyish purple under a certain light. They had JOHNNY HERBERT, Bruno Senna and three other drivers that I don't remember. It wasn't clear if they planned to rotate those drivers or if they were going to run five cars, but I think it was the latter XD

Last night, I dreamed about Lotus backing up their recent claims that they are now the second-best Renault team by Romain Grosjean going out and challenging Sebastian Vettel for 3rd place. The track looked suspiciously like Shanghai though... and I don't remember anything else from the race.

The night before last I was idly flicking through an old Motor Sport magazine just before bed and I happened to notice a classified advertisement in the back pages offering Denny Hulme's 1967 Brabham BT-24 for sale. That night I dreamt I was racing this Brabham at Silverstone, running second to a Lotus 25 and just in front of gaggle of Ferrari 156s and 158s (the magazine had articles on Jim Clark and Lorenzo Bandini as well). During the race it started to rain just enough to make the track greasy and I had a nasty spin at Stowe, somehow injuring my shoulder without damaging the car, but I continued the race and was happy to finish third. I have no idea who I was racing, but everybody on the podium was in '60s overalls with open face helmets and goggles.

On waking up, my satisfaction with my first 'podium' was short-lived as I realised I actually was in agony from an old injury to my left shoulder that had flared up through the night and I have spent the last two days walking around like Quasimodo.

Don't have racing dreams very often at all but when I do I seem to remember being a Tyrrell or Brabham driver most of the time. Probably because a friend's dad worked for Tyrrell and because the Brabham garage used to be in Chessington (before I was born though) so they've always been a favourite team of mine.

Edit: Tell a lie, they were there until 1991.

I had a dream about the double points finale in Abu Dhabi last night.

The Mercedes cars went into the lead as expected with Hamilton ahead and Danny Rick got a shocking start and fell to the back of the grid. In his haste to get back up the order Ricky crashes out on lap 3

The race is uneventful until the first stops when Chilton on the brink of a 2nd straight season with no retirements does not have a wheel attached at his first stop. The mechanics tell him to pit but as it's Max Chilton he continues and laps half a second quicker than the Mercedes with no wheel on the car. by lap 35 he is up to 7th and closing on the battle for 3rd

The battle for 3rd turns into one between Hulkenberg, Vettel and the Ferrari's. They run nose to tail for over 15 laps until lap 46 when Hulk spins at the hairpin just after the Liuzzi/Schumacher accident in 2010. Raikkonen is forced to spin in avoidance and Alonso retires when his engine blows in spectacular fhasion spitting out flames. Chilton is up to 4th and his pace mean he's just 4 seconds off Vettel before passing him on lap 50

By lap 53 the Mercedes car are 1:20 ahead of Chilton but at the end of the lap Rosberg's tire starts to delaminate. He does a Giles Villeneuve and 3 wheels it to the end but Chilton is closing by 15 seconds per sector. Then on the last lap at the same spot where Vettel pulled on in 2012 Qualifying Hamilton pulls off with a blown engine the smoke starting from Turn 9. With Rosberg passed on the final corner Chilton wins the race with 3 wheels on the car for over 40 laps ahead of Rosberg who wins the title. Vettel is 3rd.

Freeze-O-Kimi wrote:closing by 15 seconds per sector

I remember falling asleep whilst watching a particularly boring GP back in 99/2000 and dreaming that Hakkinen had crashed into a swimming pool (Note: The track wasn't Monaco!)

Also another dream where the FIA Gala was held in an industrial estate near my old house. Nobody could find Barrichello as he got locked in the local pub toilet.

The dream starts with Felipe Massa (in Williams Martini Racing suit) and Will Buxton at a scaled-down version of the Circuit de Catalunya, such that it can be lapped by an average cyclist in about the same time as a 2014 F1 car on the real circuit. The last bit of the track is a bit screwy, with Banc de Sabadell a hairpin similar to La Caixa, then the left-right chicane where the sharp right turn should be, closely followed by another identical chicane, then comes the sharp right turn, resulting in a longer run to the final turn and a longer main straight.

Anyway, they're standing by the penultimate turn and the dream switches to Massa's POV, with a bike to his right that wasn't there before the view changed. It's a yellow Huffy bike, the first one I had as a kid, but sized for an adult. Between the handlebars, the bike has a display that looks like the cockpit in GP2. Massa "gets on" the bike, as in he takes the handlebars and has his feet on the ground either side of the rear wheel, and starts pushing it backwards around the track. The bike has eight gears which work like car gears and not bike gears, and they still affect how it accelerates/tops out even though it's being pushed. After a few corners he finds that the downshifts are automatic. Around the time he comes to the chicane before (or as he's doing it, after) Campsa, everything goes a bit blurry, and after a second or two things deblur to a slightly different situation, but with its differences the dream has lost its connections to F1, so I'll stop there.

I had a very weird dream last night. It started off with me being part of the production staff of a Finnish TV show where people were given the chance to drive against famous racing drivers on PlayStation (FYI I can't recall anything like this ever being aired, and the production room looked a lot like our living room...). It was purpotedly set in the mid-1990s, with references being made to landline telephones still being in common use, however the game that was supposed to be played was Gran Turismo 4. For this particular episode, the racing driver people were supposed to drive against was none other than Damon Hill (dressed in full Rothmans Williams gear to boot). I catched brief glimpse of him before the dream moved on to the events described below.

Suddenly, I was watching a very odd motor race apparently taking place at Brands Hatch (though some of the scenery didn't match). Supposedly the race was part of the F1 championship and commentated on by the current Finnish F1 commentators. The race was already about three quarters finished when Bruno Senna retired with a spectacular engine failure... while driving a Toleman TG183B and brandishing a yellow helmet! Soon afterwards, on the final lap of the race, a huge pileup occured and I noticed that all of the cars driven were rather odd: among the casualties were two SUVs manufactured by SAIC and a white early 90s Ford Transit van. Oh, and Mika Häkkinen driving an unidentified vehicle. Then the cars that survived the pileup crossed the finish line and the winner was... Keke Rosberg, somehow. As he walked towards the podium (for some reason the camera opted to show his back and not his face) I could see that he was also wearing mid-90s Rothmans Williams race overalls. The Finnish national anthem started playing way before he had reached the podium, and the dream ended.

I too had an F1 dream last night.

It was the 2013 Canadian Grand Prix, but for whatever reason Turns 3 and 4 had been changed to 90 degree turns, taken in second gear. Anyways, Webber took the lead from Vettel at the start and then the dream morphed into me playing football for Bath Rugby, and there the dream ended...

Or did it?

Anyway, after I'd won the PGA Masters for Bath, my dream cut back to the final stages of the Canadian Grand Prix. It was a close 4 way battle between Webber, Raikkonen, Hamilton and Alonso, in that order, with 2 laps left. On the long back straight, one of the marshal's JCBs had wandered onto the track, and Webber drove straight into it, ending his race instantly. The other 3 cars missed the JCB, although Raikkonen's Lotus inexplicably exploded and Alonso vanished into thin air. This left Hamilton to take the win but on his final lap his tyres lost all grip, meaning that he drifted his way round the track. Halfway through the final lap, Ron Dennis came on the team radio and told Lewis he was doing a great job and to look after the tyres, before he was cut off by a crackly sounding Jenson Button who said "I can't do it, nooooooooooo...it's too much guys, no..."

I was then taken to the pitlane, where Ron Dennis and Norbert Haug, both dressed in tight orange t-shirts, were having a bitch-slap fight. Things were getting a bit fiesty until Paddy Lowe arrived to hold Dennis back, while Haug was restrained by...Paddy Lowe. Adrian Newey, dressed in full 1997 McLaren garb then turned up, brandishing 2 bars of soap and promptly tried to wash Dennis' face. Niki Lauda tried to take advantage of Dennis' momentary incapicatiation but just as he was about to land a haymaker right in the middle of Dennis' face, Lauda's head inflated massively; upon which a third Paddy Lowe arrived and popped his head with a pin.

I then woke up, vowing to never, ever, google Paddy Lowe before bedtime ever again.

Been at the cheese Takagi?

That wasn't cheese, that was mushrooms in a wormwood sauce.

Also, someone with artistic talent needs to draw the scene with the three Paddies, possibly with Niki's head mid-explosion.

dinizintheoven wrote:Also, someone with artistic talent needs to draw the scene with the three Paddies, possibly with Niki's head mid-explosion.

That is an incorrect statement.

takagi_for_the_win wrote:Halfway through the final lap, Ron Dennis came on the team radio and told Lewis he was doing a great job and to look after the tyres, before he was cut off by a crackly sounding Jenson Button who said "I can't do it, nooooooooooo...it's too much guys, no..."

For some reason, I totally lost it right there... sigged, good sir.

Watched the Austrian Grand Prix in my sleep this morning and drivers crashed out one by one e.g. the two Williams taking each other out. With about 10 laps to go only 9 cars were left. The Mercedes were still 1-2, Mark Webber was 3rd for some reason in a Sauber and in 5th was Susie Stoddart IIRC. That's as far as I can remember from my dream.

Apparently I watched the German GP in my dream but it looked a lot like Silverstone before the renos in 2009. Rosberg and Vettel were on the front row, but Rosberg had technical troubles midway through the race, as did Vettel.

For some reason, the World Cup final between Germany and Argentina was to take place midway through the race, so I switched over to that. Argentina won 2-0, since Germany failed to register a shot on goal, and Messi somehow got a goal from 60ft out from the left wing (don't ask) and scored the other goal in stoppage time.

Having cheered for Germany during the match, I was in complete agony until I switched over to the race results - for some reason, Sergey Sirotkin in the Sauber won the race, with Sutil second (also for Sauber), and some other guy in third. But about a minute later I get word Sirotkin crashed into someone midway through the race, and was to get penalized after the race. Soon enough, the wiki page reports Sirotkin got a thirty-second penalty, and Sutil won the race. I was in even more in agony...

Aerospeed wrote:Apparently I watched the German GP in my dream but it looked a lot like Silverstone before the renos in 2009. Rosberg and Vettel were on the front row, but Rosberg had technical troubles midway through the race, as did Vettel.

For some reason, the World Cup final between Germany and Argentina was to take place midway through the race, so I switched over to that. Argentina won 2-0, since Germany failed to register a shot on goal, and Messi somehow got a goal from 60ft out from the left wing (don't ask) and scored the other goal in stoppage time.

Having cheered for Germany during the match, I was in complete agony until I switched over to the race results - for some reason, Sergey Sirotkin in the Sauber won the race, with Sutil second (also for Sauber), and some other guy in third. But about a minute later I get word Sirotkin crashed into someone midway through the race, and was to get penalized after the race. Soon enough, the wiki page reports Sirotkin got a thirty-second penalty, and Sutil won the race. I was in even more in agony...

Funnily enough, I had a similar, strange dream when I fell asleep midway through class (yep ). Hoewedes scored two own goals, and I swear he was celebrating after one of those. And in that dream, the Brazilian GP was taking place right beside the field (yeah, at Rio) and Massa was dominating...in a Mercedes!!! And Juergen Klinsmann was driving a #27 Ferrari.

There were a lot more things that happened, but I don't remember clearly. I have a vague memory of Higuain celelbrating with Hoewedes though

I had a similar dream as well

It was raining at the World Cup final. 2 minutes before the match, it was announced that Ralf Schumacher will replace Manuel Neuer. At an interview, he said that success in the World Cup will help him secure a karting seat for the next year

Argentina won 3-2, and Ralf punched Messi in the face after the match. I heard Murray Walker screaming this: "OAARGH!!! MY GODNESS!!! What is Schumacher doing? No matter what he's doing, Daniel Melrose has just won the F3 race at Daytona!" For some reason, he was speaking Finnish.

The next thing I saw was Gaston Mazzacane dancing in the streets of Rio de Janeiro (yeah...) and Roberto Moreno in his 1998 Project Indy overalls cheering next to him. I also noticed that Richard Petty's 1992 car was parked next to a local store.

Later, Petty ran out of the store and started laughing at Mazzacane and Moreno.

The F1 race was fairly eventful. Grosjean was on pole, driving his 2009 Renault. Räikkönen was second in his WRC car, and third was... wait for it... Sebastian Saavedra! He was driving... nothing! In fact, he was running

At the start, Ricciardo took the lead with last year's Red Bull, but he spun off at the second corner, hitting a tree. The safety car (HWNSNBM's Minardi) was out for 46 laps. At the restart, Saavedra took the lead, Grosjean was second and Valentino Rossi third. Suddenly, I saw the GPM2 "It's raining on the track" text. The race become very interesting. Neil Horan went into a cloning machine, and created an army of track invaders. They teleported on the track, causing total chaos. Adrian Newey fell from the pit wall.

Meanwhile, Moreno was doing something with his laptop. Suddenly, all the computers near the track crashed and the drivers all stopped on the track. With 3 laps to go, the FIA decided to teleport the whole track into Finland, where the race was continued. Enrico Bertaggia won the race driving this year's Force India with a pink helmet. After the race, the track teleported back to Germany.

The last thing I saw was Mazzacane riding a bike at a desert. That's where the dream ended.

That's what you get for watching IndyCar at midnight...