The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
- Ataxia
- Not Important
- Posts: 6862
- Joined: 23 Jun 2010, 12:47
- Location: Sneed's Feed & Seed (formerly Chuck's)
- Contact:
The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
So what can I tell y'all about Texas? Well, for starters, everything's bigger in Texas. I ain't bein' vulgar, no sir, but you member that prize watermelon y'all thought was big? Over here, our watermelons are so huge you could claim it as a private domicile...and fill any trespassers full of lead. Or claw marks. Depends how you interpret the right to bear arms.
He's not waiving that right, he's waving his left.
Let's go back through the history of Form'la 1 races in the grand ol' US of A. Many many years ago, when Richard Petty had still yet to be crowned as The King, the Indy 500 used to be a part of the F1 calendar. I know, crazy right? Then it came off after the 1960 edition, and the US graciously hosted them boys from Europe at Sebring and Riverside before The Glen picked up the baton.
Now, the Glen was a mighty fine track, but it started getting unsafe as the F1 crew chiefs started playing with tape, wedge and aerodynamics. There was also the US Grand Prix West over in Long Beach, but the drivers were more interested in getting bronze over silverware, lemme tell ya.
It's pretty long, I guess...
Then, the races in the US started drifting about like a...well, a drifter. Ending up in Vegas like one of them bachelor parties, the organizers threw together a track in the Caesars Palace parking lot. Puttin' it all on black, so to speak. 1982 was a grand ol' year for America, with Detroit putting their hands up to do a third US race. Sweet land of liberty.
In 1984, and I ain't talkin' about no book, they got rid of Long Beach and brought the race to the Lone Star, holding it in Dallas for a year. Detroit was the only city to wave the Stars 'n' Stripes until Phoenix replaced it in '89, lasting three seasons before li'l Bernie tore up the contract.
After a hiatus, the Grand Prix came back in 2000 for a road-course race at Indianapolis. People seemed to be okay with it, unless you're Ralf Schumacher who was hitting the final corner exit before JR Hildebrand made it cool...wait, that was a different corner? Damn Europeans, and their clockwise circuits...
Probably a good job he never tried doing the 500...
Now we're doing the business in Texas again, driving around the Circuit of the Americas! There ain't much scenery, but who needs that when you got a darn big tower and the red, white and blue painted all over the place? Be wary of sudden wind gusts, though - those can change championships, I hear!
So, y'all enjoy the Form'la 1 race in Texas! Me? Them NASCAR play-offs ain't gonna watch themselves...
Although they just ain't gonna be the same...
Mitch Hedberg wrote:I want to be a race car passenger: just a guy who bugs the driver. Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Man, you really like Tide...
- dinizintheoven
- Posts: 3997
- Joined: 09 Dec 2010, 01:24
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
Billy Bob Hamburger Jr. III from Kennedale, in the Dallas-Fort Worth area wrote:Myrtle? That'n there crazy gaaah over the road with the gaaahd-damn un-'Murican 'lectric hippy car's hosin' down bitsa old computers agin!
I endorse The 8-Bit Guy and all his works. Even if he is a Commodore man.
"...the Life W12, I can't describe the noise to you, but imagine filling your dustbin with nuts and bolts, and then throwing it down the stairs, it was something akin to that!"
- The Chicane
- Posts: 107
- Joined: 14 Dec 2014, 21:37
- Location: Near the Yellow Teapot!
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
11 : Drivers' titles
12 : Constructors' titles
- Ataxia
- Not Important
- Posts: 6862
- Joined: 23 Jun 2010, 12:47
- Location: Sneed's Feed & Seed (formerly Chuck's)
- Contact:
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
The Chicane wrote:COTA is probably one of the best modern tracks on the calendar.
Hah, I feel the opposite! I can forgive the fact that it's essentially a cut-and-paste job of everyone's favourite bits from the world's circuits: the opening hill climb stolen from Austria, the Maggotts-Becketts clone, the mirrored Hockenheim stadium and Istanbul Turn 8.
What I can't forgive is the complete lack of scenery. At least Caesars Palace had an excuse for looking like a car park, since it was actually was one. Just...give me interesting buildings! Trees! Anything!
Mitch Hedberg wrote:I want to be a race car passenger: just a guy who bugs the driver. Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Man, you really like Tide...
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
Okay, maybe not so overboard....just lunch and dinner.
What did she do in her past life to deserve this?
Signup for the Random Racing League, Season TWO!!!
- AustralianStig
- Posts: 1206
- Joined: 21 Apr 2013, 00:26
- Location: Adelaide, Australia
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
CoopsII wrote:Biscione wrote:To the surprise of no-one, Daniil Kvyat wins ROTR for Sochi, by a record margin that may not be surpassed for some time.
I always knew Marko read this forum.
- dinizintheoven
- Posts: 3997
- Joined: 09 Dec 2010, 01:24
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
WaffleCat wrote:Little known fact: Ataxia had to eat three large, fatty, greasy burgers, the kind that disintergrate in your hand after the first bite, covered in bacon, egg, bacon, pickles, more bacon, stacks of melted cheeses, more bacon and whatever 'special sauce' for breakfast, lunch and dinner just to summon enough FREEDOM spirit just to write that preview.
Okay, maybe not so overboard....just lunch and dinner.
Breakfast was pancakes with syrup and bacon, and more syrup. HFCS with artificial colouring, of course - what do you think this is, Canada?
"...the Life W12, I can't describe the noise to you, but imagine filling your dustbin with nuts and bolts, and then throwing it down the stairs, it was something akin to that!"
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
AustralianStig wrote:So the purple Pirelli ultra-softs are going to be pink this year, to raise awareness for something.
I think it's to raise awareness of Pippa Mann's entry at the Indy 500 each year. By raising awareness, she hopes to add more races to her race schedule.
watka wrote:I find it amusing that whilst you're one of the more openly Christian guys here, you are still first and foremost associated with an eye for the ladies!
MCard LOLAdinizintheoven wrote:GOOD CHRISTIANS do not go to jail. EVERYONE ON FORMULA ONE REJECTS should be in jail.
- AndreaModa
- Posts: 5806
- Joined: 30 Mar 2009, 17:51
- Location: Bristol, UK
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
- AustralianStig
- Posts: 1206
- Joined: 21 Apr 2013, 00:26
- Location: Adelaide, Australia
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
dr-baker wrote:AustralianStig wrote:So the purple Pirelli ultra-softs are going to be pink this year, to raise awareness for something.
I think it's to raise awareness of Pippa Mann's entry at the Indy 500 each year. By raising awareness, she hopes to add more races to her race schedule.
Well that is a campaign I can get behind!
CoopsII wrote:Biscione wrote:To the surprise of no-one, Daniil Kvyat wins ROTR for Sochi, by a record margin that may not be surpassed for some time.
I always knew Marko read this forum.
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
Ataxia wrote:The Chicane wrote:COTA is probably one of the best modern tracks on the calendar.
Hah, I feel the opposite! I can forgive the fact that it's essentially a cut-and-paste job of everyone's favourite bits from the world's circuits: the opening hill climb stolen from Austria, the Maggotts-Becketts clone, the mirrored Hockenheim stadium and Istanbul Turn 8.
What I can't forgive is the complete lack of scenery. At least Caesars Palace had an excuse for looking like a car park, since it was actually was one. Just...give me interesting buildings! Trees! Anything!
I agree, don't like it much either. Coupled with the elevation the track profile itself is fairly nice (although the originally planned, more flowing profile was even better - but then the FIA slapped the Americans and reminded them that a FIA standard circuit cannot possibly be that exciting! Because...eh, because rules! And regulations!)...but it's just in the wrong landscape.
The huge tarmac runoffs with their seizure-inducing paintings are not of help, either.
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
I guess its just representative of the Sky era in Britain 2012 onwards.
Felipe Nasr - the least forgettable F1 driver!Murray Walker at the 1997 Austrian Grand Prix wrote:The other [Stewart] driver, who nobody's been paying attention to, because he's disappointing, is Jan Magnussen.
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
giraurd wrote:Ataxia wrote:The Chicane wrote:COTA is probably one of the best modern tracks on the calendar.
Hah, I feel the opposite! I can forgive the fact that it's essentially a cut-and-paste job of everyone's favourite bits from the world's circuits: the opening hill climb stolen from Austria, the Maggotts-Becketts clone, the mirrored Hockenheim stadium and Istanbul Turn 8.
What I can't forgive is the complete lack of scenery. At least Caesars Palace had an excuse for looking like a car park, since it was actually was one. Just...give me interesting buildings! Trees! Anything!
I agree, don't like it much either. Coupled with the elevation the track profile itself is fairly nice (although the originally planned, more flowing profile was even better - but then the FIA slapped the Americans and reminded them that a FIA standard circuit cannot possibly be that exciting! Because...eh, because rules! And regulations!)...but it's just in the wrong landscape.
The huge tarmac runoffs with their seizure-inducing paintings are not of help, either.
That's interesting, I don't remember the track layout changing from the original proposal. What changes did they make?
kevinbotz wrote:Cantonese is a completely nonsensical f*cking alien language masquerading as some grossly bastardised form of Chinese
Gonzo wrote:Wasn't there some sort of communisim in the East part of Germany?
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
Wasn't quite as different as I recalled, but still - this fast version of the esses would have been Suzuka/Silverstone-esque, whereas the profile it turned out to be is a bit mickey mouse already; and the original "fast in, slow out" profile might have made the corner I call "Turkey T8 with not enough entry speed" a bit more interesting, as well.
- AdrianBelmonte_
- Posts: 804
- Joined: 30 Nov 2014, 12:53
- Location: Moderdonia (google it)
- Contact:
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
Here it is, ready to make us feel proud
#HaasShouldBeSoLucky
- Bobby Doorknobs
- Posts: 4060
- Joined: 30 Jul 2014, 17:52
- Location: no
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
Say what you want about his other tracks, at least they're unique in a sense. Valencia's insane final sector, the last turn at Yeongam, the snail turns on Shanghai. Each track at least has something characterful about them.
COTA, on the other hand...feels just bland. I don't know what it is, but it just doesn't stand out as a track that would stick in my mind. It's a good track, don't get me wrong, but it just feels...tacky.
What did she do in her past life to deserve this?
Signup for the Random Racing League, Season TWO!!!
Re: The 2017 Grand Prix of Austin presented by FORMULA 1®
Daniil Kvyat wrote:I don't think I was meant to be happy
I'm getting more than a touch concerned about Kvyat's mental health after quotes like this, the last 18 months have been horrible for him. The situation is made worse by the poisonous F1 fanbase on social media. He needs to get out of Red Bull and find somewhere where he'll be appreciated and actually have proper support. It doesn't have to be F1, there are plenty of other series where he can thrive and rebuild his reputation.
Meanwhile, I bet all the Kiwis tuning in to watch Brendon Hartley's debut are gonna be impressed.
Fetzie on Ferrari wrote:How does a driver hurtling around a race track while they're sous-viding in their overalls have a better understanding of the race than a team of strategy engineers in an air-conditioned room?l